Do you have a low self-esteem? Would you like to boost your self-worth to go from self-doubt to high self-worth? In this article I want to give you a simple method you can use to boost your opinion of yourself continuously.
Why is self-esteem so easy to lose nowadays?
Self-esteem is so easy to lose nowadays, isn’t it? All you have do is compare yourself to all your cooler, nicer, more successful friends on social media. Just go on social media and check out all the posts from other people and wallow in self pity. Clearly everybody else is better looking than you, more successful and does more exciting fun stuff. Because that’s all you see on social media right?
Social media makes you compare yourself to other people and this lowers your self-worth but there are also real things in life that happen to you that can lower your self-esteem. Things that make you feel that you have no value. Those things could be other people or things that happen to you that just are hard to take. Sometimes people are taking advantage of you or life just gets the better of you and those things can really affect your self-esteem.
First I want to define self-esteem very briefly. Self-esteem is how we value and perceive ourselves. It’s based on our opinions and beliefs about ourselves. Low self-esteem means that you have a low opinion of yourself and your abilities. A high self-esteem means that you have a high opinion of yourself.
You can influence your own self-esteem
So how do you get from low self-esteem to high self-worth? The great thing about self-esteem is that it’s not one of those completely static things. Self-esteem fluctuates constantly. So you may do something and temporarily you feel amazing and you feel great about yourself and then something happens and your self-esteem drops immediately because something happens that made you feel worthless.
This could be a curse on one hand because you can never relax and say “well my self-esteem is set for life”. On the other hand it’s a great opportunity because it means you can influence it. You have influence over the level of your self-esteem. It’s all about the idea of doing things that make you proud and only saying things that make you proud. When you are proud of yourself it means that your self-esteem is high. So only do things that make you proud and say things that make you proud! That is the formula for boosting your self-esteem. Let me explain what I mean by that…
Make decisions that are in correspondence with your values
In our lives we are constantly taking actions and saying things that either lower our self-esteem or boost our opinion of ourselves. You can influence your self-worth by choosing to stop saying and doing things that lower your opinion of yourself and by choosing to do and say more things that boost your self-esteem. Now what am I talking about?
Well we all have our own values. We all know what makes us proud and we all know what makes us feel low about ourselves. So for example if you know that you want to be a healthy person and at the same time you know that a Twix bar for lunch is full of sugar and it’s probably not going to work very well for you to be a healthy person, then when you choose to eat the Twix bar you are lowering your opinion of yourself.
So if you make a conscious choice to eat the thing that you know is in correspondence with your values of “I want to be a healthy person” then you are going to consciously boost your self-worth. If you are somebody that believes that it’s important to be friendly to people then you are lowering your self-esteem if you even have negative thought about other people. So when you have negative thoughts stop yourself and decide that you want to think and speak positive about other people. When you do that you will boost your self-worth immediately. Does that make sense?
Speak and act in a way that boosts your self-esteem.
Use your own filter to boost you self-esteem
So what would happen if you applied this filter to everything you do and say during the day? I’ll tell you what happens. First of all you will notice things that make you feel lower about yourself. That way you will learn more about your own values. What are the values that matter to you? You will start to develop an awareness of what actually lowers your self-worth but you will also get into the driving seat and you will notice that you will become more proud of yourself as you go along the day.
And here is the thing…most people think that self-worth is built when you achieve amazing things. So a lot of people would say “Oh well I’ll feel proud of myself when I have made a million dollars”. But there are millionaires that don’t have high self-esteem. There are models who feel ugly. There are incredibly successful people who have low self-worth. It just happens in their own mind.
It just happens in your own mind! You need to take action and say things that make you feel proud. And this really depends on what your own values are and what makes your proud, not to me or to the society. It needs to make YOU proud. It’s your own little filter. Ask yourself “Will this make me proud or not?” If so do it and if not don’t do it. Do the alternative thing or don’t do the thing at all.
Examples from my own life
I will give you a few examples from my own life. What doesn’t make me proud is for example if I think negative about other people. That instantly lowers my self-worth. It also doesn’t make me proud if I’m internally complaining about things. I manage those thoughts by replacing them with other positive thoughts.
What boosts my self-worth is when I approach situations in the way that I really respect (for example when I take the high ground). I also feel proud when I do my best, when I set goals and take action. Or when I am doing something for somebody else. When I help and motivatie people.
So when I need to boost my self-worth I know what to do. I need to stop doing the things that lower my opinion of myself and do more of the things that boost my self-worth.
So always be aware and consciously choose things that are boosting your self-esteem!