Have you noticed that a lot of us are always complaining about the weather? Especially when it’s rainy and dark outside we tend to blame the weather for feeling less happy, feeling lonely, being angrier, having lower self-esteem and for being more sad.
Last week in the Netherlands it has been stormy, rainy and cold. And everywhere I go people are talking about how terrible the weather is. I’m constantly hearing something like this out of people’s mouths on the street, at stores, and in restaurants:
It’s so cold I hate it….. What a terrible weather ….. ….I hate the rain….It’s too damn windy…This weather makes me feel depressed and so on. How often do you blame the weather for your mood or how often do you talk negative about the weather?
I have caught myself doing the same and that inspired me to write this article. Because talking negative about the weather and letting the weather affect your mood seems harmless but it can be more damaging than you might think.
Blaming the external factors makes you a victim
We tend to blame the weather but also other external factors for our unhappiness. But think about that for a minute? Why is it nature’s fault that you are feeling sad or unhappy? Nature is just doing her work. Not a single person has any control over the weather and still you are allowing it to negatively affect you. You allow the darkening clouds to dictate your mood.
We tend to do the same with other external factors like other people or circumstances. We react to the external world as victims, surrendering to the belief that we are helplessly subject to the external world. The mind and the ego want to focus on what’s not good, complain about it and become a victim.
“Happiness is an inside job. Don’t assign anyone else that much power over your life.”
But out of the hundreds of the external conditions you are blaming there may be only one or two factors that are the real cause for your unhappiness. The other factors you are blaming are just innocent ones that you included because your mood is not good.
We have this strange need or conditioning to not take responsibility for our own happiness. We expect it to come from an outside source.
It can happen, but it’s fleeting. True happiness has to come from within.
True happiness comes from a connection to our true being.
Make your own weather regardless of whatever storm happens to break
I’m a strong believer that if you change your mind, you can change your mood. We can always take our power back by managing our minds. You can always control your thoughts rather than being controlled by what we can’t control.
We are never without a choice. That doesn’t mean things don’t happen outside of our control, or that our choices can’t be severely limited. But you can always make a different choice. Rather than reacting to the weather outside (that you can’t control) or other external factors (that you can’t control) you can make your own weather. You have to look inward instead of outward.
You have a choice to decide how you are going to think and feel based on what you value regardless of whatever storm happens to break. Take responsibility and do not surrender like a victim.
“Wherever you go, no matter what the weather, always bring your own sunshine.”
Anthony J. D’Angelo
Taking personal responsibility means not blaming other external factors for your unhappiness. It means figuring out ways in which you can be happy despite the storm. Make your own weather regardless of whatever storm happens to break!
A person who has taken personal responsibility recognizes an all-important truth about happiness: your happiness depends much more on your attitude than it does on objective, external circumstances.
Being responsible means not blaming others for your unhappiness. It means figuring out ways to be happy despite the external influences.
Happiness is a choice.
“Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms—to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way.”
You have the ability to control your own emotions. It’s time to change the way you categorize and think about things as simple and fundamental as weather.
So next time If it is pouring rain, it might be the perfect opportunity to put on your muck boots and go dancing in the rain!